All posts by Sabrina

Sabrina

That Time Rob Made Sabrina Listen to Rush: “I Hate Them So Much, I Don’t Want To Write This”

[Note: In keeping with the alcohol portion of sportsalcohol, I was drunk when I wrote most of this. I needed to be drunker.]

GOOD GOD I DON’T EVEN WANT TO READ WIKIPEDIA TO RESEARCH THIS.

They are collectively hideous. Husband says that one dude’s hair is amazing in this photo IT IS NOT.

Now. Husband is making me watch some horrible “Tom Sawyer” video. That keyboard riff is being played one-handed and I think I have the skills to do it  (which says absolutely nothing).

HE WON’T LET ME TURN THIS OFF  FEELING STABBY.

I’m half Canadian. I am wishing I am not on the off-chance some ancestor of mine IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS EXISTING.

NERDS! THEY HAVE SONGS TITLED “RIVENDELL” AND “THE NECROMANCER”. There is a song about trees. (I realize it is a metaphor, but it is a terrible one.)

I hate men singing in falsetto. This is like…I don’t even know. When I was, like, 10 and listened to NKOTB, I HATED any song Jordan sang JUST because of the falsetto AND THIS IS SO MUCH WORSE. It’s like falsetto in a fish tank or when you talk into an oscillating fan.

WANT TO STRANGLE HUSBAND FOR MAKING ME LISTEN TO THIS FOR “INSPIRATION.”  HE HAS TAKEN THE REMOTE MY CIVIL RIGHTS!

THE LYRICS ARE ATROCIOUS. Seriously, I would expect comparable, if not better, writing in some sort of high school literary publication.

I DON’T KNOW WHAT THIS SONG IS. THERE ARE HARDLY ANY WORDS AND JUST ENDLESS BORING GUITAR & DRUM SOLOS.

I FORGOT IT WAS THE TREE SONG! FUCK!

Cocktail Time!

Creeped out by chimpanzees? Have friends or loved ones potentially making you see Dawn of the Planet of the Apes with them? We’ve put together a cocktail of calming ingredients to help you pregame (or sneak into the theater, if necessary, with a flask or small thermos) so you are prepared for those “damned dirty apes”.
[note: we did test this cocktail & it succeeded in making me calm enough – or drunk enough, after a couple – to agree to watch the first Planet of the Apes film]

The Great Escape

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(or, for these purposes, alt. title: “The Ape Escape“)

Continue reading Cocktail Time!